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Kensey's Korner

(What.......me syntax?)

New Sex Study Complete

Kensey was recently the recipient of a major award for his ground breaking research into the relations between the sexes. He was awarded first place by the Purdue North Central English Awards Committee for his research paper "Fetching Bums" which explores the mis-guided means women use to attract mates and suggests remedies for their travails.

It is thought by some that these brilliant new insights into the human condition may revolutionize sexual relations in America, revitalize the marriage industry, and bring divorce rates to near zero.

The always erudite and fulsome Professor of American and English English and the curator of the seventh largest collection of Babylonian stew pots in Indiana, Dr. Roger Schlobin (schlobin.doc) has written a review of "Fetching Bums" that can only be described as raving.

Read "Fetching Bums" for yourself and see if it doesn't change your life forever.

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A major study was once conducted (possibly reported in "Psychology Today") that sub-divided a group of Americans citizens into various categories and administered written tests that determined their levels of happiness and satisfaction with their lives. The results:

  1. Happiest group -
  2. Unhappiest group -
  3. Second most happy group -
  4. Second most unhappy group -

This would seem to vindicate the common sense notion that men are generally happier than women and marriage only exacerbates the gulf between the sexes as it relates to satisfaction with their lives. Now, as Kensey has discovered, scientists have made huge strides in solving this dilemma and the clues pointing them in the right direction were from a most surprising source. Read about the fusion of ancient art and modern science in "Phlegmatic Women."

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Remember when only men had 16 pound balls? Read a lament for the good old days in
The Once Manly Culture of Bowling.

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Kensey is a millwright at Bethlehem Steel and also attends Purdue University North Central where he is majoring in Computer Technology.

Kensey is married to a Dainty Little Real Estate Lady (Home Page)

Here are some sites that Kensey has found useful and/or interesting..

BOF Mechanical Local 6787 E-mail Addresses and Union Links
HTML Editors
Background selector
backgrounds abound....
Hypertext Webster Interface
The HTML Writers Guild Website
The Atlantic Monthly
Strunk, William. 1918. The Elements of Style.


Send smart-aleck remarks to Kensey Alsman at kensey@niia.net




copyright © 1995